Geek & Goth Valentines

Valentine's Day approaches. It's that special time of year when you can express your undying love for...

florists, greeting card companies, and chocolate manufacturers. (I do profess a certain fondness for the last.) This year I shall do my part to diminish the profits of card companies by providing, free of charge, an assortment of short verses that you may use in hand-crafted missives to your Valentine. These verses are guaranteed to claim the hearts of their recipients (or your money back).

Geek Valentines (Budget Constrained)

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Until I get work
Here's a cheap IOU.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm allergic to both
So will text graphics do?

Geek Valentines (Hormone Driven)

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Come and party tonight
Bring your twin sister too.

Lan-party for two. Early start.
Beat my frag-count: we'll dine, a la carte,
At the Hilton, first class.
But if I pwn your a$$
Then you pose for my comic book art.

Geek Valentines (Socially Challenged)

For you, here's a Valentine's card
To show my persistent regard.
I must (my friends said)
Get you out of my head,
But your webcam is making it hard.

Your insistent admirer is me.
Your beauty, it longs to be free.
Your elegant form
Leaves me tingling and warm
As I watch from your neighbour's oak tree.

Goth Valentines

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
But since they're not black
They're simply not you.

Roses are black,
Violets are black;
I've tailored your gift
With my airbrushing pack.

Blood is so red,
Lilies, so white;
Would you share my pain
On St Valentine's night?

Blood is so red,
Lilies, so white;
Your mood is so dark
You make midnight seem light.



Roses are red
Truffles are black
And bloody expensive--
so hop in the sack!

Goth AND hormone-driven:

Roses are thorny
Corpses are dead.
I'm hoping this poem
Will get me some head.

Violets are blue
Roses are red
If you were my Valentine
You'd have no head

Inspired by Fafblog's St Valentine picture