February 2005

What is it?

From a distance it appears as a huge puppet. It lurches and staggers, swinging its swollen limbs, flinching at invisible beatings, knees jerking, driven by forces blind to the damage of its own body parts. On closer inspection the stench of decay becomes apparent. It is animated but terminal, a careless leper. Parasites find comfortable homes deep beneath its skin. They thrive and multiply without ever needing to give anything to their unwitting host.

This grotesque being used to know people. It understood loyalty, humour, and personality. Now it craves human brains for no other reason than to fuel its own metabolism. Its ability to digest them has degraded. It needs more and more of them, but the larger ones are becoming harder to swallow.

You can't speak to it or reason with it. You can't stop it without extreme violence. Just wait for it to fall apart by itself. Then it will be consumed by others of its ilk, desperately trying to extend their corporeal existences.

V-Day is coming

I couldn't resist writing some Valentine's Day limericks to express the gentle loving spirit of the occasion. Rather than stick to the time-honored "I love you" message, I've tried to highlight some of the other guises adopted by love.

As your slave on this Valentine's Day,
I'll serve wine and expensive paté.
For the rest of the year
Bring me icy-cold beer
And a big juicy T-bone, okay?

I know you hate Valentine's Day
Since your last love was "taken away".
While he decomposes
He's pushing up roses,
So I've brought you a lovely bouquet.

What to wear on this Valentine's Day?
Would a cardigan be too risqué?
Maybe horn-rims (ideal
For their raw sex-appeal),
And my combover? No, my toupee.

It's Spammy Time

I installed Pivot Blacklist today, just in time. There had been a trickle of spam comment posts being added to old posts in the VirJournal. Fortunately I finished the Blacklist installation before the relative flood of spam comments started. It's been blocking an average of a spam post per minute for the last two hours. This is probably peanuts compared with what more popular blogs suffer. Still, I'm glad I'm not having to clean them all out.